HANSPETER
20-04-2008, 03:23
We've all played them, but how exactly are they made? I believe I've found a foolproof formula that is guaranteed to instill aggravation in the customer.
1) Insuring that soldiers, when ordered to grenade a gun/mg position in bastogne, ignore the command as soon as a shot is fired in Japan, and instead decide to go and 'cap' the soldiers in the gun by walking up to it, standing in front of it and getting blown to Narnia.
2) Insuring that entrenched soldiers, when ordered to relocate to another position IN THE SAME TRENCH, walk out of it, in a direct line to the next position, especially if there is heavy enemy mg fire covering that position. Optionally insure that due to the fire they all go prone instead of running like hell to make sure they all get pwned.
3) Insuring that situations as say, a lone bazooka soldier standing in the middle of an enemy camp, with fire going on all around him, is still able to simply stand around, untargeted while he comfortable loads his zooka to then drive shell up a heavily escorted tanks BUTT.
4) Insuring that things like AT gun, and Artillery guns are practically IMMUNE to HE shells, and eve after hurdled through the air several meters, ca be simply placed back into service by picking them up and taking a seat.
5) Insuring that for unknown reason, such as that some soldiers are born cross-eyed, sometimes soldiers, and incidentally soldiers in vehicles will consistently miss whatever target they are assigned to, including but not limited to a BARN.
6) Insuring that subtle terrain elevations are nearly impossible to spot due to horribly restricted camera which zooms in and out when scrolling over the terrain, and in so doing create situations where tank or generic gun X is consistently firing at anthills in the terrain while completely ignoring menacing threat Y bent on total destruction of tank or generic gun X.
7) Insuring that tanks, when faced with both smg/mg soldiers and armored targets, consistently opts to load HE shells which will then 50% of the time be planting those HE shells into the armored target making it very ANGRY but not really contributing to it's extermination in any meaningful way.
8) Insuring that soldiers, and vehicles alike have blind faith in command so situation like an order given to 'move to this position' is followed through REGARDLESS of distractions such as one DAMN enemy soldier standing there owning them all one by one.
9) Insuring that the decision made by AI whether or not to use grenades is based on utter randomness. In that way situations where units are ordered to attack a soldier in the open, they will get up, pull a nade, and get shot, yet when ordered to attack an entrenched enemy soldier will be more inclined to run up to the trench, get mangled and if lucky take a potshot at the entrenched enemies before being sent to their maker.
When you combine all these factors into one game you get Faces of War, and incidentally a very frustrating, not to say AGGRIVATING online gaming experience. That is not to say a 'bad' online gaming experience, but let's be honest here, when after a nice gaming session you fee inclined to remove the heads off a litter of freshly born kittens to quell the frustration in your bones, one cannot really say that it 'good' either.
That being said, and being fully aware of the changed in developer team, I'm hoping that the AI in Men of War will see some serious improvement so situation like these may be avoided, and the kittens of planet earth may once again live out their natural lifespans without being constantly beheaded by aggravated gamers such as myself.
1) Insuring that soldiers, when ordered to grenade a gun/mg position in bastogne, ignore the command as soon as a shot is fired in Japan, and instead decide to go and 'cap' the soldiers in the gun by walking up to it, standing in front of it and getting blown to Narnia.
2) Insuring that entrenched soldiers, when ordered to relocate to another position IN THE SAME TRENCH, walk out of it, in a direct line to the next position, especially if there is heavy enemy mg fire covering that position. Optionally insure that due to the fire they all go prone instead of running like hell to make sure they all get pwned.
3) Insuring that situations as say, a lone bazooka soldier standing in the middle of an enemy camp, with fire going on all around him, is still able to simply stand around, untargeted while he comfortable loads his zooka to then drive shell up a heavily escorted tanks BUTT.
4) Insuring that things like AT gun, and Artillery guns are practically IMMUNE to HE shells, and eve after hurdled through the air several meters, ca be simply placed back into service by picking them up and taking a seat.
5) Insuring that for unknown reason, such as that some soldiers are born cross-eyed, sometimes soldiers, and incidentally soldiers in vehicles will consistently miss whatever target they are assigned to, including but not limited to a BARN.
6) Insuring that subtle terrain elevations are nearly impossible to spot due to horribly restricted camera which zooms in and out when scrolling over the terrain, and in so doing create situations where tank or generic gun X is consistently firing at anthills in the terrain while completely ignoring menacing threat Y bent on total destruction of tank or generic gun X.
7) Insuring that tanks, when faced with both smg/mg soldiers and armored targets, consistently opts to load HE shells which will then 50% of the time be planting those HE shells into the armored target making it very ANGRY but not really contributing to it's extermination in any meaningful way.
8) Insuring that soldiers, and vehicles alike have blind faith in command so situation like an order given to 'move to this position' is followed through REGARDLESS of distractions such as one DAMN enemy soldier standing there owning them all one by one.
9) Insuring that the decision made by AI whether or not to use grenades is based on utter randomness. In that way situations where units are ordered to attack a soldier in the open, they will get up, pull a nade, and get shot, yet when ordered to attack an entrenched enemy soldier will be more inclined to run up to the trench, get mangled and if lucky take a potshot at the entrenched enemies before being sent to their maker.
When you combine all these factors into one game you get Faces of War, and incidentally a very frustrating, not to say AGGRIVATING online gaming experience. That is not to say a 'bad' online gaming experience, but let's be honest here, when after a nice gaming session you fee inclined to remove the heads off a litter of freshly born kittens to quell the frustration in your bones, one cannot really say that it 'good' either.
That being said, and being fully aware of the changed in developer team, I'm hoping that the AI in Men of War will see some serious improvement so situation like these may be avoided, and the kittens of planet earth may once again live out their natural lifespans without being constantly beheaded by aggravated gamers such as myself.